Month 35 – November

Another month down. I’ve been sticking to my diet as best as I can. It’s been tough, food is very bonding experience and now having my own personal diet that doesn’t allow for a lot of variety has been pretty isolating. I’m okay with it but doing the other diets (keto, paleo, AiP) with my girlfriend was somewhat easier just because I at least had someone to share food with (and the misery that comes with not being able to eat bread and sugar). Going out almost feels pointless to me at this point; I used to always like to get a little snack or a coffee or something when I was out but I can’t trust any food that I don’t make myself anymore. Everything has added sugar or high fructose corn syrup in it. Even if I go to a restaurant there’s usually nothing I can have because it’s more than likely cooked in canola oil or some other cheap, low quality oil. So it’s just chalk flavoured smoothies for me everyday instead.

I’ve seen some improvement this month but the itch hasn’t been eliminated, my face is still oozing in a couple spots, my joints always feel like they need to be cracked, and I’m still sweating at night while being cold all day. Other than that, I’m ok but those things can really sap my energy, especially if I don’t get a proper sleep. Having holes in your skin can really affect your mental health too. To put it in Star Trek terms my shields are down and all auxiliary power is being routed to life support systems.  I don’t really like leaving the house for a couple reasons: I feel really vulnerable a lot of the time with a compromised skin barrier and I know how weird I look scratchy and cracking my joints all the time.

I’m sorry if I repeat myself a lot in these blog post. It feels like I retread the same ground every month: “I think this month was better, but maybe not, I don’t really know.” It’s hard to know how much progress I’m making but I think since I’ve started trying to tackle this dysbiosis issue I think I’m on the right track. I’ve gained a few pounds in the last month which is encouraging, I couldn’t seem to gain any weight for a long time now, dipping down as low as 130 lbs. I think that was due to malnutrition due to a permeated intestinal lining.

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